I'm just going to say this and you can agree or disagree with me at will, if you're a woman over 30 years old, you have no business wearing any sort of sweatpants, shorts, boxers, etc. with the words "HOTTIE, CUTIE, WOW" whatever on them.
I was walking down an aisle in Walmart today (another blog topic as well), and I saw a woman who was about 10 years too old and 30 pounds too heavy, wearing a pair of bright red jogging shorts with the words "HOTTIE" spread out over her backside. Now, if I was going to wear apparel making such a statement, I would make sure I looked like a Victoria Secret model before heading out the door, but that's just me. I just can't understand why women tell themselves "I look good" when donning something so silly. What goes through their minds.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all about personal expression. Tattoos all over your body wouldn't cause me to bat an eye, O.K. maybe it would a little. Personalized license plates are an effective way of telling the world a little something about yourself as well. Mine says "6 PAK".
I guess what I'm trying to say is that if you're 6 or 21 years old, by all means, have words sprayed across your derriere, it's appropriate. Maybe I'm just jealous. Maybe I should try it myself before I make the statement that we women over 30 should know better. Maybe if they made a pair of shorts with "MOM, MOM, MOM" over them, I'd wear them. And yes, my behind can accomodate that many words. Tell me what you think about this, I'd be interested in hearing.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Who's Account-able?
My husband and I share a joint checking and savings account. Always have, always will. Years ago, when we lived with one another before getting married (yes, we were one of THOSE couples), we had separate accounts. I was always confused during this period too. Whose income was responsible for what? Who would pay the electric bill? Who would pay for groceries? Since we were making comparable incomes, we essentially split expenses. But, after a month or so of trying to figure out who was accountable for what, we decided to go ahead and pool our resources and just pay everything from one account.
Here's why I bring up this topic. A friend of mine, who has been married for over 20 years, informed me that she and her husband have separate accounts. Essentially, her income and his income go into one account in HIS name. She maintains a separate checking account from income earned at another part-time job, income which is not sizable by any means. Her husband pays all household expenses from HIS account and when she needs extra money, she has to ask him. I asked her repeatedly, how is this possible? In this day and age, how many more husbands and wives are out there in similar situations?
I am by no means demeaning anyone if you are in this type of situation. I just wonder how you make it work. My husband and I decided that the best solution for our family was to put everything into one pot, regardless of who made more and regardless if the income was supporting children from previous marriages. I have to give my husband credit, he has never once told me I couldn't spend any amount of money on the children just because they came from another biological contributor. Telling me to quit spending so much money on the children altogether, now that's another matter :-).
So who's account-able in your marriage? For my family, we're going to continue doing what we've always done - my husband's money is my money, and my money is my money too.
Here's why I bring up this topic. A friend of mine, who has been married for over 20 years, informed me that she and her husband have separate accounts. Essentially, her income and his income go into one account in HIS name. She maintains a separate checking account from income earned at another part-time job, income which is not sizable by any means. Her husband pays all household expenses from HIS account and when she needs extra money, she has to ask him. I asked her repeatedly, how is this possible? In this day and age, how many more husbands and wives are out there in similar situations?
I am by no means demeaning anyone if you are in this type of situation. I just wonder how you make it work. My husband and I decided that the best solution for our family was to put everything into one pot, regardless of who made more and regardless if the income was supporting children from previous marriages. I have to give my husband credit, he has never once told me I couldn't spend any amount of money on the children just because they came from another biological contributor. Telling me to quit spending so much money on the children altogether, now that's another matter :-).
So who's account-able in your marriage? For my family, we're going to continue doing what we've always done - my husband's money is my money, and my money is my money too.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
I am not Wonder Woman
I admit, I used to think having it "all" defined me. Now that I'm older and wiser (at least in my eyes), having it all or the wonder woman syndrome isn't exactly what I'm striving for.
Do I still want the fulfilling career, happy/healthy children, loving husband, nice home, etc., of course I do. However, now I realize that always feeling fulfilled and completely satisfied with myself in those areas are and will always be eternally elusive. On any given day, I may feel that I'm doing a great job with the kids yet probably not so great at work. Or maybe my husband could use a little more attention and I should forget about the kitchen floor needing to be swept.
Too often in the past I've beaten myself up when all the spokes in the wheel of my life weren't running together in the same direction. I'm tired of these emotional bruises that I've inflicted on myself. It's taken me awhile to get here, but I'm actually happier when my life isn't perfect. It keeps me on my toes and as one friend told me many years ago, perfect is boring. God knows I'm not bored!
I wouldn't mind those cuff bracelets Wonder Woman wears though. Puts my silver Tiffany one to shame. And the invisible jet would be cool as hell. But oh well, like millions of other women, I'm OK not being Wonder Woman. Are you?
Do I still want the fulfilling career, happy/healthy children, loving husband, nice home, etc., of course I do. However, now I realize that always feeling fulfilled and completely satisfied with myself in those areas are and will always be eternally elusive. On any given day, I may feel that I'm doing a great job with the kids yet probably not so great at work. Or maybe my husband could use a little more attention and I should forget about the kitchen floor needing to be swept.
Too often in the past I've beaten myself up when all the spokes in the wheel of my life weren't running together in the same direction. I'm tired of these emotional bruises that I've inflicted on myself. It's taken me awhile to get here, but I'm actually happier when my life isn't perfect. It keeps me on my toes and as one friend told me many years ago, perfect is boring. God knows I'm not bored!
I wouldn't mind those cuff bracelets Wonder Woman wears though. Puts my silver Tiffany one to shame. And the invisible jet would be cool as hell. But oh well, like millions of other women, I'm OK not being Wonder Woman. Are you?
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Sleeping with the boss
Is it bad that I'm 40 years old and still don't consider myself grown up?
When I was a child I thought a 40-year-old was ancient. Surely at this age, a person would be settled professionally and personally. Although I may be as settled as one can be (chasing 4 kids around)personally, my professional life is evolving yet again.
As of June 1, I will be working for my husband at his insurance agency, a whole other blog topic I'm sure :-) This means no longer having to clock in at an office and trying to work 9 - 5. I'm sure there will be long days ahead yet the long days will be entirely dictated by ME, not my husband, not a boss, not another co-worker, but ME. I will I eat what I kill, or in less graphic terms, I will make as much or as little money relative to the amount of time I spend working. Needless to say, with 4 kids hunkering in the background, I plan on working a lot.
Am I a little scared about this whole self-employed thing? You bet. Do I have faith that my husband and I working as a team will be ultra successful? Abso-f**kinglutely.
My only question is what kind of perks do I get sleeping with the boss? :-)
When I was a child I thought a 40-year-old was ancient. Surely at this age, a person would be settled professionally and personally. Although I may be as settled as one can be (chasing 4 kids around)personally, my professional life is evolving yet again.
As of June 1, I will be working for my husband at his insurance agency, a whole other blog topic I'm sure :-) This means no longer having to clock in at an office and trying to work 9 - 5. I'm sure there will be long days ahead yet the long days will be entirely dictated by ME, not my husband, not a boss, not another co-worker, but ME. I will I eat what I kill, or in less graphic terms, I will make as much or as little money relative to the amount of time I spend working. Needless to say, with 4 kids hunkering in the background, I plan on working a lot.
Am I a little scared about this whole self-employed thing? You bet. Do I have faith that my husband and I working as a team will be ultra successful? Abso-f**kinglutely.
My only question is what kind of perks do I get sleeping with the boss? :-)
Sunday, April 25, 2010
We're dating again
My husband and I are dating again, not each other or other people though. Huh you say? I mean we're dating another couple, as in forging a new friendship with a couple who just moved in across the street. I think finding a NEW couple friend whom you're compatible with and can stand to be around for longer than 15 minutes of idle chit chat is challenging. You see, I believe the process of becoming friends is similar to the process of a dating couple.
On your first "date", you ask the typical discovery type questions. Questions like: how many children do you have, where do you work, where did you go to college, what's your favorite alcoholic beverage (doesn't everyone ask that question?) and so on and so on. After these questions are answered you then have to decide if you liked them enough to come around again OR if they liked you enough to want to be around you again.
On your second, third, fourth dates, you begin to hear stories about them from their youth and early adulthood, some flattering and others not so flattering, but all along, getting to know their real selves a bit more. And whether or not these tales of lore either induce you to want to find out more about them or if they make you want to run towards the hills faster than Forrest Gump determines if you truly can become a couple friend.
It's when you become a couple friend that the really interesting situations arise. When do you become comfortable enough to have them see you in your jammies? In my case, I'm easy, it only took a few dates :-) Or when do you reveal how bitchy you really can be, again, in my case, I'm easy. When do you let your bodily functions come out to play without feeling humiliated? Or is this reserved for when you become the old married couple couple? For clarification, the old married couple couple are those friends who know EVERYTHING about you and then some AND yet they still hang out with you. You know who you are! :-)
It's funny, just when we thought we didn't have enough room or time in our lives for more friends, we find ourselves dating again. Will they replace our married couple couples we already have? Nah. Will we get past all the wooing and dating and become an old married couple with them? I'm thinking there's a real possibility.
On your first "date", you ask the typical discovery type questions. Questions like: how many children do you have, where do you work, where did you go to college, what's your favorite alcoholic beverage (doesn't everyone ask that question?) and so on and so on. After these questions are answered you then have to decide if you liked them enough to come around again OR if they liked you enough to want to be around you again.
On your second, third, fourth dates, you begin to hear stories about them from their youth and early adulthood, some flattering and others not so flattering, but all along, getting to know their real selves a bit more. And whether or not these tales of lore either induce you to want to find out more about them or if they make you want to run towards the hills faster than Forrest Gump determines if you truly can become a couple friend.
It's when you become a couple friend that the really interesting situations arise. When do you become comfortable enough to have them see you in your jammies? In my case, I'm easy, it only took a few dates :-) Or when do you reveal how bitchy you really can be, again, in my case, I'm easy. When do you let your bodily functions come out to play without feeling humiliated? Or is this reserved for when you become the old married couple couple? For clarification, the old married couple couple are those friends who know EVERYTHING about you and then some AND yet they still hang out with you. You know who you are! :-)
It's funny, just when we thought we didn't have enough room or time in our lives for more friends, we find ourselves dating again. Will they replace our married couple couples we already have? Nah. Will we get past all the wooing and dating and become an old married couple with them? I'm thinking there's a real possibility.
Tuesday, April 20, 2010
Hen House vs Wal-Mart
Belt tightening, budget, expense control, saving, cost reduction...whatever you call it, it's still the same to me - trying to save in areas where you can, not only because the wallet may dictate it, but also because it makes sense, literal cents.
My husband quit his corporate job a few months ago and started his own business. When this happened, we both knew that we would have to be more cautious with our discretionary income until his company gets into full swing. Large quarterly bonuses have been replaced with bonuses of a different kind - no more corporate ladder or red tape, both of which are priceless!
A new business did mean our family would have to make some adjustments. To me, it meant no more going to our local Hen House on a whim and trying to see if the discount retailers like Wal-Mart and Aldi would save our family money. Big duh right? Of course they did. Yes, the produce in Hen House might have a bit more gloss and it is convenient to buy everything at a store only a couple blocks from my home. However, afer a few weeks of doing some serious cost comparisons, I've realized I can save my family HUNDREDS of dollars a month by shopping at other stores. Why haven't I been doing this all along?
I'm not advocating one store over another. I still frequent my Hen House, always will, just not as frequently as I used to though. Does this mean I won't be getting my annual "thank you" gift from them at Christmas, maybe. Does this mean I'll go back to my Hen House ways again in the future, I'm hoping not.
My husband quit his corporate job a few months ago and started his own business. When this happened, we both knew that we would have to be more cautious with our discretionary income until his company gets into full swing. Large quarterly bonuses have been replaced with bonuses of a different kind - no more corporate ladder or red tape, both of which are priceless!
A new business did mean our family would have to make some adjustments. To me, it meant no more going to our local Hen House on a whim and trying to see if the discount retailers like Wal-Mart and Aldi would save our family money. Big duh right? Of course they did. Yes, the produce in Hen House might have a bit more gloss and it is convenient to buy everything at a store only a couple blocks from my home. However, afer a few weeks of doing some serious cost comparisons, I've realized I can save my family HUNDREDS of dollars a month by shopping at other stores. Why haven't I been doing this all along?
I'm not advocating one store over another. I still frequent my Hen House, always will, just not as frequently as I used to though. Does this mean I won't be getting my annual "thank you" gift from them at Christmas, maybe. Does this mean I'll go back to my Hen House ways again in the future, I'm hoping not.
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
To Glee or not to Glee?
Admittedly, I'm late to the Glee viewing game. It seems like everyone I know has been telling me I neeeeeed to see the show. So after much persuasion from neighbors, co-workers, Facebook friends and even children, I sat down to watch it tonight. Of course I loved it.
That's not the point, it's a given that I would like a musical variety show. If you know me, I've been known to bust out into song now and then. My point or rather question is, why doesn't my husband like these type of shows or even musicals all together?
Is it the X/Y chromosomal difference? How can he stand to watch episode after episode of Monster Garage but wilt like spinach in a hot skillet when I mention words like "Wicked, Sound of Music, West Side Story or Cats"? Not only do his eyes glaze over but he looks at me as if I've made up new vocabulary words, as if he's never even heard of the words before.
Maybe it's like getting your first summer tan. Maybe he should ease into Glee or other musicals, bit by bit. Start with a small amount of exposure and gradually increase until he can sit through the height of the sun, or in this case, an entire episode.
Does your husband/boyfriend/partner Glee?
That's not the point, it's a given that I would like a musical variety show. If you know me, I've been known to bust out into song now and then. My point or rather question is, why doesn't my husband like these type of shows or even musicals all together?
Is it the X/Y chromosomal difference? How can he stand to watch episode after episode of Monster Garage but wilt like spinach in a hot skillet when I mention words like "Wicked, Sound of Music, West Side Story or Cats"? Not only do his eyes glaze over but he looks at me as if I've made up new vocabulary words, as if he's never even heard of the words before.
Maybe it's like getting your first summer tan. Maybe he should ease into Glee or other musicals, bit by bit. Start with a small amount of exposure and gradually increase until he can sit through the height of the sun, or in this case, an entire episode.
Does your husband/boyfriend/partner Glee?
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